“THE JULIA ANDERSON” - 4 oz. Whiskey + 4 oz. Coconut milk + 1 oz. Crown Royal Whiskey. Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

 

acti-veg:

For every glass of milk you are drinking, there is a calf who is not.

Except that they’ve all been slaughtered for veal.

Just as some percentage of drivers are jerks, so too is some percentage of cyclists—I reckon about 15 percent in both cases. And I’m sure 15 percent of Segwayists are jerks, and 15 percent of jetpackists will be jerks at some point in the future. The Jerk Constant is as immutable and universal as π. The point here is to remember that the majority (85 percent!) of cyclists are not that punk you encountered last Tuesday, so don’t let that frustration get the better of you whenever you see a cyclists up ahead.

How to Not Kill a Cyclist by Matthew Baldwin in The Morning News (via cadenced)

I can’t read the news anymore. All I do is tear it apart. A product of my journalism school education, I’m sure. Also a product of the fact that most writing these days is pitiful. I’m gonna pick on one story in particular right now. http://www1.whdh.com/news/articles/local/south/10012153862712/one-hurt-after-car-drives-into-wollaston-t-station/#?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

Now, I don’t know why I should expect good writing from a local broadcast news station website. But this is really bad. 

Headline: One hurt after car drives into Wollaston T station

(This happens to be about my hometown. #notsurprised)

The text: 

QUINCY, Mass. (WHDH) — A car drove straight into the Wollaston MBTA station in Quincy at 10 o’clock Thursday morning.

An elderly woman, around 77-years-old, drove off the top of the stairs and continued right into that door of the train station.

The car was in a very unusual position up against the door. A man was in that area and hit by her but not pinned. That pedestrian is said to have sustained minor injuries.

Firefighters say it’s believed the woman who had a disability, had a medical problem that may have caused the accident.

“Firefighters began CPR and she was transported. Not sure of the injuries on the pedestrian. They took precautions and they will check him out. He was complaining of hip and knee injuries,” said Dep. Chief Ed Fenby, Quincy Fire Dept.

Firefighters say the injuries in the accident were relatively minor but not sure whether the medical condition of the woman that may have caused this accident might put her in more difficult shape.

Both were taken to Quincy Hospital. Firefighters said that if this happened a couple of hours earlier with more commuters around, it could have been a lot worse.

Now let’s break it down:

An elderly woman, around 77-years-old, drove off the top of the stairs and continued right into that door of the train station. I’m sorry, she’s “around” 77-years-old? What bullshit is that? Either you know she’s 77 years old, and you say so, or you leave that shit out. Also, why are you referring to it as “that door”? None of us can see you pointing to the door. 

The car was in a very unusual position up against the door. A man was in that area and hit by her but not pinned. That pedestrian is said to have sustained minor injuries. OH MY GOD THE PASSIVE VOICE. MAKE IT STOP. WHO said the pedestrian sustained minor injuries? Also, how old is this man? Where is he from? 

Firefighters say it’s believed the woman who had a disability, had a medical problem that may have caused the accident. The tense with which you’re writing is ALL OVER THE MAP. You need a comma between woman and who, but her disability didn’t disappear following the accident. She’s still got it, whatever it is. So use the present tense HAS. Same goes with HAS a medical problem. And don’t get me started with the vaguery.

Firefighters say the injuries in the accident were relatively minor but not sure whether the medical condition of the woman that may have caused this accident might put her in more difficult shape. When you read this sentence, the person is saying that the injuries in the accident were not sure whether the woman’s medical condition caused the accident. They also say “the woman that may have caused this accident” - I thought that was confirmed?!

Both were taken to Quincy Hospital. Firefighters said that if this happened a couple of hours earlier with more commuters around, it could have been a lot worse. WHO took them to the hospital. Firefighters said that if this WHAT happened? And you couldn’t have found a better word to use than “a lot” worse?

There is no hope.

trelyon:

If zombies ever attack just go to Costco… they have concrete walls… years of foods and supplies… and best of all the zombies can’t get in without a Costco membership card

Genius.